Counting Down...

I haven't blogged in years. Obviously. But I was feeling the need to rant, and a facebook update just wasn't cutting it. So I dug into the old blog. What could I possibly want to rant about?

I'm pregnant.

Technically, I have 6 weeks left. My midwife thinks we can encourage things to get going sooner, and since my little man may be a bit large, that would be fine.

So here's our family update. Me and the hubs are still married. Yay! 12 1/2 years and counting. Moose is turning 11 this July. Holy cow! I can't believe my first little man is so close to becoming a teenager. Monkey is about to turn 8. She's thrilled, as she will now be able to get her ears pierced. Munchkin is turning 6 this weekend, which she reminds us of on a daily basis. We now have Muppet. She is 2 1/2 and a general terrorist. But she's flippin' adorable, so we figure we'll keep her. And we're expecting our second little man, and most likely last child, that we've already decided to call Minion.

May 9th. That's the magical date. Although if you ask me, I say once May starts it's on! Midwife says he's big, which is to be expected. My last man was 9 lbs., 22 in. I swear, if this Minion isn't longer than that I'll be amazed! He hasn't dropped yet, but I can feel him coming up my throat on a daily basis. Every time I stand up, I have to pee thanks to his wonderful cranium pressing on my bladder. He's constantly stretching out into my right rib cage, making sleep a tricky business. My stomach is also squished so small I can hardly eat more than a fist-sized portion of anything. But I have to be careful of my blood pressure, which is constantly low. Eating regularly helps, but eating too much gives me mad heartburn and indigestion, which is so uncomfortable! I have burped everything. Like ice cream! It's not the worst. Taco burps are pretty gross. Pickles, ew! But really, burping anything over and over again for any length of time is no fun.

Another fun side effect of this low blood pressure is a more or less constant exhaustion. Kinda like lethargy, really. For example, this week is spring break so we've been taking it pretty easy. My hubby noticed I have been resting a lot. Chilling on the bed, reading books, watching some tv. He asked me if this was my new thing, if I'll be able to take care of the kids next week when he's back at work and we're back to our usual routine. I said, I'd be fine. But if there's nothing pressing on my time (getting the kids through their homeschool work each day, or piano lessons), I have no desire to do anything.I'm happy to sit, recline, lay, and just be. My body craves it, to be honest. I don't get restless, my mind doesn't wander to all the things I could be doing. It just rests. I can do things, don't get me wrong. I told him to tell me if he needs help getting something done. He's been busy tearing up our basement (another post entirely) and it's nothing I can really help with. So me and the kids do our thing each day, and are just enjoying not having immediate responsibilities.

Well, I feel a little bit better. Not really. I need to eat some tums. And I should probably eat lunch, even though I honestly don't want to. Who wants to eat when you already have indigestion? But if I don't, my blood pressure will drop even more. Bleh. 6 more weeks. 6 more weeks. 6 more weeks.

How do I know you're guilty?

Seriously, what parent can't answer this half a dozen different ways? Anyway, this is my story from yesterday. To preface, I slept really poorly with chronic headaches and although I felt a bit better during the day, was really tired (obviously not at my sharpest) and apparently missed some of what my girlies were doing while they were playing.


I was walking into my living room, and walked past Monkey. She was sitting on the floor. As I walked by, she looked at me and simultaneously tried to quietly hide what she was doing under her legs. It was like there were red flashing lights surrounding her face. I promptly asked her what she was doing. Turns out she was playing with a little egg ornament that used to be glued to a small tree I got in the dollar section at Target last year. When I saw what she had, I was like, "what?" and then I turned to my piano, which holds my sweet holiday decorations, to find that all of the little plastic egg ornaments had been ripped off. Seriously? It within the next 15 minutes or so that I realized they had also taken down this delicate basket which held a few empty easter eggs in it, played with that, as well as two little egg shaped chicks, which also adorned my piano. Everything had become a plaything. I about died. Was I really that off my game yesterday? Man. Anyway, tangent.


I have no problems seeing the guilt ooze off my children's skin when they are lying or know they are guilty of something. What's it like for you?

I've waited almost 8 years...

So, I've heard that kids mature...eventually. Not too long ago we were watching my niece, who is 1 year older than Moose. She's always been a bit spazzy and energetic, but for some reason this day she was calm and ultra sweet. It was so wonderful! I sent her parents a pic of her snuggling with my girls on the couch as they watched a movie. They told me it had just happened recently. She was acting much more mature, not doing some of the negative behaviors she used to. They said it was like a switch went off in her and she just changed.


On to my kids. Mr. Moose, who will be 8 in July, has very recently been displaying new behaviors which, to be honest, tickle me pink. Just lately he has been ultra sensitive to Miss Munchkin. Anytime she cries, he goes to her and asks her what's wrong. He will tell you that he can always calm her down. (Although today he added, "if she lets me") It has just been such a wonderful thing to see him so sympathetic to her and understanding. It really is a treat. Don't get me wrong, Moose can complain with the rest of them about perceived injustices. But he really tries to understand why things need to be done and be a part of making our family work.


I always wanted a boy to be our first so our kids could all have a big brother. I had 3 growing up and it just always seemed important to me. I can say now, that he's getting older and maturing a bit, that my girlies are so very lucky to have such an awesome big brother. I know they'll have rough patches, as all siblings do, but he tries. Really hard. I think sometimes it's just awesome to see your kids internalize things you've taught them and you realize they were listening. Seriously, isn't that the best feeling ever? :)

Birthday Updates and other random stuff

So yesterday was Monkey's birthday. Holy moly! She had a pretty great day. Instead of having a birthday party, we had a birthday playdate with her two best girlies. Oh, and Munchkin. She was there too. :)


We had cake and presents that night after her chosen dinner of french toast. It was a nice day. She was quite the princess for the day, and has been struggling with sharing her new things. Which is unfortunate, since Munchkin has been a super sharer with all of her new things from the moment she received them. And Monkey has taken full advantage, since they're both obsessed with my little pony and horses, and both received similar items for their birthdays.


On another note, Munchkin has been a ROCK STAR with her potty training. Hooray! She sure is like her big brother. When we decided we were doing this potty thing, she took a day or two and she's been good. Hasn't had an accident in a few days. She even woke up almost completely dry today, which is huge. I've gotten her to start using the big potty, instead of her potty seat, and she's been great about it. She still struggles with the usual getting on the stool and managing the pants and all that. But it'll come in time. It's so nice to know that she's working her way to independence in this matter. I was so determined to not have 2 kids in diapers come September, and it looks like my wish will come true! Score one for the parents!


So, just a random note. We have considered homeschooling for a few years now. I know that the longer you wait, the less likely your kids will be successful because they become established where they are. Up til now, Moose has been okay with it, and gets pretty excited. For the first time, I decided to ask Monkey about it. She is adamant that she wants to homeschool. I'm sure she'd be great in public school, but I find her strong feelings interesting. Of all the years to want to homeschool, this year probably seems like the worst, since I'm pregnant and due mid-September. Nonetheless, we're considering it anyway.  For a sort of trial run, we're going to do some schooling this summer. This isn't unusual for us. We usually sprinkle in learning into our summers to keep the kiddo's minds sharp. But I'm going to put a bit more effort into it this summer. The hub's biggest concern is that the routine and schedule of it won't burn me out. We're pretty sure the kids will do well, as long as we make the effort to get them involved in our homeschool association (there are tons of homeschoolers where we live) so they continue to have good social experiences and group learning situations. Anyway, wasn't planning on writing a lot about it. Just that it's something going on our in lives at the moment.


All in all, life is good. Can't complain about that.! :)

Parental Nightmare

So this post is not metaphorical. It is about a very literal nightmare I had last night. It was one of those dreams that leaves your heart pumping when you wake up and you are so unsettled you can't go back to sleep. The hubs was on his way to work (around 6 am) so I was able to tell him about it and get it out of my mind a little bit and get back to sleep.


Here's the awful, horrible dream. I was on some sort of tropical vacay with my fam. No spouses were there. Just me and my siblings with our kids. It started out with breakfast and I might have scolded Monkey. Not sure about that part. Then my other sisters showed up and were asking about bathing suits and whatnot. They left (I think they were with my kids, but like any dream, it's all full of holes and whatnot) and me and my other sister went out. Fast forward and it's late afternoon. I'm walking around with 3 others. We have a map of the area. There are 2 areas. The one that we were in, which was quite large, and one a ways away, where my little bungalow was. I wanted to get back to my kids really bad. I had been gone all day and just wanted to see them. I had a kind of pamphlet paper with a map on it, but the map wasn't helpful, and eventually the map disappeared from the pamphlet altogether. I was kinda freaking out at this point and might have figured out where to go, but me and my sister went back to inform the other 2 we were with that we were leaving. Upon going back, I found all my family. My sisters, my parents and my brothers. Once I saw my sisters, I assumed they had my kids. Lo and behold, they didn't. I about lost it. I was ranting about how angry I was and how they had been alone all day long and my oldest was only7. I was so peeved! Then I was in a room with everyone and one of my brothers teased me about worrying. I called him a jerk, or something around those lines and left. I finally decided to ask someone who worked there where to go to get back. She was practically ancient and not super sure, but pointed me in a direction. At this point it was past sunset and I was postal. There was another worker on the road and he confirmed I was indeed going the right direction. All I could think about was how scared my kids must have been that they'd been alone all day long in a strange place. I was just about to break into the fastest sprint I've ever managed when I woke up.


That's the nightmare. Now, I never had a nightmare like this until I had kids. But let me tell you, even writing it down makes my emotional brain revisit how awful it felt. I remember wanting to wake up and just hug my children and make sure they knew I would always be there for them. Before my kids, I didn't know such potent emotions existed. It was literally beyond my comprehension. These sorts of feelings started when I was pregnant with Moose. Just imagining what would happen if the hubs died, or what would happen to the hubs if I died. It was like I had joined the club of people who have regular anxiety attacks because they now possess a greater love than they previously knew was possible and the idea of anything happening to it has the capability of literally making my heart break.


At times I may be flippant about parenthood. We make jokes to get through the rough times, because it helps us survive. I once read that you can either cry or laugh about it, but since crying gives me headaches, I choose to laugh. And that's certainly true of parenthood. But let me leave no doubt that I take my job as a mother very seriously. These children are my life. I would do anything for them. Anything. And I'm sure any parent I know feels exactly the same way. It's just what happens when you join the club.

Satisfying Sunday

I didn't end up posting Sunday because I was so worn out,  but in the best way. It was such a great day. I was feeling super positive and energetic. I ended up having a lot of great bonding time with Moose. He actually started out having a bit of a rough day.


Sometimes he gets negative about Sundays. In our family Sunday is a day to go to church and have family time. We don't go shopping, we don't go out and play sports or hang out with friends. We don't watch regular television or play our normal computer games. We try to make it a different day, set apart from the week. Lately, this has been rough for Moose.


Sunday started out that way a little bit. But as the day went on he was fine. When I got back from church choir practice (I'm the pianist) we were all sitting around having a snack. At one point, Moose and Munchkin were both put in time out for continuing a game I asked them to stop. A little while later, Moose lost his snack (a bowl of popcorn) for disobeying the hubs. At this point, he went to his room and sulked. I was in my bedroom at the time reading my scriptures. I went in to his room and talked about what had happened. Turns out he had already had one time out before I came home, and then add on the two other things that happened and he was not having a good day. We had already talked about doing the "important" things (reading our scriptures and writing in our journals) before we played a board game or did something fun. So I asked him if he wanted to join me in my bedroom to do his important things with me. The girls were off playing a game and I knew we could be away form the rest of the family. I had just read my scriptures and was doing some additional reading, then journal writing. Moose decided that was a good idea. So he joined me in my room.


In my room, we quietly did our important things. After he read his scriptures, we talked about what he read and had a little discussion. I love those discussions with him. Then he wrote in his journal. He wrote all about his basketball game Saturday, the last of the season. We talked about that too. Then when he was done, we discussed the different fun things we could do with the rest of the day. We decided that after we were done with our important things (the hubs included) we would play a game. He wanted to play Scattergories. After dinner, we made lemon tea cookies together. He picked the recipe. I had him read to me each step of the instructions and all the ingredients and their measurements. He measured and poured and did as much as possible. He even spooned out one cookie sheet of the cookies. It was so much fun! He did such a good job too! Afterwards we were able to share our creations with everyone. It was such a satisfying day!


Not every day is like that. He had his rough moments, but I totally handled it like a pro. It felt so good! I loved being able to communicate to him in ways that worked for him. Being in school during the day, he doesn't get a lot of big one-on-one time with me, so it was such a treat. I've thought in the past that his language of love (if you're unfamiliar with that concept, look up the book "The 5 Love Languages. Highly recommend it.) is quality time. Which he doesn't always get, though we do try. So this was such a great day for me to share my love for him with some really great quality time. Like I said in the beginning, I was too tired to post, but for all the right reasons.


Sometimes you just have to document a day like this, because they aren't so common. But remembering them helps you to know that they do exist and they'll happen again. :)

Play dates rule

Sorry for those of you who are my facebook friends and we've already had this mini-discussion, but it's all I've got today. This morning/afternoon I watched my friend's two kids ages 5 and 2. It was so great! From the moment they were here I was pretty much able to ignore my children. They were so busy with each other that no one cared what I was doing or where I was. What freedom! 


When Moose was little, play dates were a lot more work. You were managing two kids (hopefully not more) who needed constant management, interventions, redirections, and play options so they don't get bored and really get on your nerves. It was a chore, to say the least. However, now that they're older and self-directed it's awesome!


Honestly, my biggest trouble was that they don't have 3 kids. Their oldest is 2 years younger than Moose and only a year older than Monkey, but he's a boy. We've known them since our boys were wee things and their little guy totally looks up to Moose. But Monkey can't be left all by herself right? So of course she asks to play what they're playing. And instead of making things easy and relatively uncomplicated, Moose complains and fights about her playing with them. Ultimately I explain why it's not cool to leave her out. Their games weren't all the intricate, she wasn't ruining anything and he knows it's not cool to leave kids out who want to play. By then Monkey'd given up and was playing with the two little girls. The ironic thing? Monkey sings bits and pieces of a song from the newest version of "My Little Pony" and part of it goes like this, "...big brother best friend forever...". Uh yeah. Not really. Not in our house. But it'd be nice, right?


Now, I'm totally guilty of not having play dates hardly ever. With Moose in school, he can only do them on weekends, and they tend to be kinda busy. Monkey's only got a few friends and I just stopped trying to set up play dates. They both do pre-schools during the week at day intervals I don't care to remember.  It's just more complicated than I care to bother with. But play dates are truly awesome. Perhaps I'll have to put forth the effort every now and then, now that I remember how nice they are for me. Perhaps.

Makin' it work

So today and yesterday I was plagued with little girls who refuse to take a nap. Ultimately I end up closing their bedroom door which is like an open invitation to get out of bed and start goofing off. Fortunately for me (and while I know I'm fortunate, sometimes it is still just annoying) the girls do stay in there for a good chunk of time, depending on if someone ends up crying. Then they're stuck playing with each other and can't ask for tv or computer time since they didn't nap.


Anyway, what often happens to me is I get thrown off by their unwillingness to nap. Even though I usually end up with "me" time, it's tainted by my frustration by the fact that they're not sleeping. When I write it down like that it really sounds so stupid. But it's true nonetheless. So that happened yesterday. I got in this big funk since they wouldn't sleep, and I had fought with them for a little while about that fact, and it totally tainted my afternoon for a while.


Well, today was the same deal. Giggling, not sleeping, girls. I still gave them strict warnings, and even a consequence (no computer time for Munchkin while Monkey and I do preschool tomorrow morning) which I fully intend on following through with. However, since I could see the pattern emerging, I decided to change my response. It made all the difference in the world. Not for them really, but for me. I still finished up my "me" time, and then I got on with the chores I had to get done before picking up Moose from school. By accepting the fact that they were not going to sleep, but would play in their room (though not nearly long enough. Yesterday felt like an hour. Today was more like 15 minutes) it made it easier for me to just get on with my day. I knew that I wouldn't be entertaining them, as I had a lot on my plate, and so I just decided that if they didn't sleep it would make them real tired tonight, but didn't need to ruin my day.


It's amazing what a little self-talk can do. :)  And seriously, broken routines like this have ruined my day. Sometimes they get all cranky and needy when they don't get a nap. Or they want to be entertained by me or the tv, neither of which I want to allow. But they're getting older now and it's just something I have to let go. For my sanity.


So yay for adjusting, and making sure a not-so-ideal situation doesn't make my day not-so-great.

Little victories

*This post will contain mention of pee and poop. So click away now if you need to.


So I'm trying to get Munchkin to potty train. So far I've had absolutely no success. For a while I could get her to poop in the potty because it was so obvious when she was going to do it. But lately I've had no luck. The day started off okay. I asked her to sit on it once, with success. That was good. Although I was telling her when to do it, so I still wasn't convinced she could actually recognize the urge. Then during lunch she pooped in her undies. So not okay. After that it was "naptime" which is in quotes because the nap didn't happen. Once I got the girls out of their room from their playtime, I got the lady back in undies and we kept trying. It wasn't until I was back from picking up Moose from school, and was talking on the phone with my sister, that I heard Monkey say, "Mama, she's sitting on the potty."  Huh? I totally didn't know what she was talking about. So I turn around and see Munchkin sitting on our little potty (which generally sits in the living room somewhere). She had sat on it of her own accord, without my prompting. Wha?!? How awesome is that?!


So seriously, I cheered for her and wanted to do a little dance. It was so awesome! She knows when she needs to pee! Now don't get me wrong, she's still going to have dozens of accidents before we're out of the woods, but at least now I know she can be in the woods and it's not pointless! So exciting!


So excuse my mommy moment as I enjoy this little victory over potty training.  Yay! :D

Once a parent...

Always remembering how to be a parent. So, I'm pregnant with #4. You know what I do before each of my babies is born? Re-read the books "The Baby Whisperer" and "Happiest Baby on the Block". Why would I re-read these each and every time? Why, because it's been so long since the last one was born, I've forgotten half of what we did. Granted, there are some things you don't forget, but you'd be amazed at what you do forget.






Take for example when my third was born. I had a really rough time breastfeeding for a while. I had a horrible time with Moose, then was able to learn and have a good experience with Monkey. So with Munchkin I thought we'd be good. However, I totally forgot some of the tips I used to help out in the beginning as baby got established. I went through a short stint nursing Munchkin when it was insanely painful because she hadn't been latching on right, and I had forgotten how I had made it work with Monkey. Luckily I got it sorted and we got on the right track. But, it just amazed me what I could forget.






My sweet sister has a blog The Parenting Toolbox about parenting. I was reading a post today about the 3 strikes rule. She explained it really simply and explained how it works and what you do. Now, this is something I totally did with Moose. You ask them to do something. They don't do it. You make sure they acknowledge what it is they were supposed to do and give them a consequence for not doing it. If they don't do it after that, you follow through with the previously designated consequence. Easy right? Sure it is. But by the time I got to kid #3, we had resorted to a million warnings, bribes, delaying, hollering from across the room, etc. Where did my resolve go?  Now that I'm a mama of 3, and the years have seriously worn on my resolve, I'm no longer that stick to my guns-no nonsense mom. But just reading her post about it reminded me that I used to be and that it's easy enough to do it again.






And I seriously needed that reminder. When it comes to getting Monkey to do her morning chores, it's like pulling teeth. I set a timer the other day and it took her around 15 minutes to make her bed, say a prayer and floss/brush/swish her teeth. That may seem like a lot of stuff, but if I told her there was ice cream once chores were done, they're seriously be done in under 5. No joke. But now I've been reminded of how to be a parent, the type of parent I once was, and I am resolved to change my slackey habits.






Well, that's the plan anyway. We'll see what happens. :)